Disempowerment again.

Empowerment-and-disempowerment is the third most read AWD post.

Here's another take on the issue, in a very different situation two and a half years on.

I still believe that it's important to preserve abilities for as long as possible even when it might be easier for us to take over. A current example for me: I've been pre-loading S's spoon and getting her to hold it and feed herself longer than I care to remember. This is incredibly time-consuming and can be very frustrating when she drops the spoon or spins it round so that food drops off. Sometimes towards the end of a meal I feed her the last few spoonfuls and that is a lot easier. But there are now so few things she can do for herself that it seems perverse to stop her doing one of them. It's so easy to disempower someone.

Interestingly, the (very experienced) carer who comes in twice a week always feeds her. As she's generally very good, I put up with this but it makes me even more determined to continue to load the spoon myself when I'm in charge.