One of the most frustrating things for someone with dementia must be the sense of losing control, of being unable to do things for yourself, of having to rely on other people for help with the most personal of tasks. Just the thought of being in this situation is pretty scary for most people who aren't in this situation.
Even if we weren't able to work this out for ourselves, people with dementia who are still able to do so tell us that this is the case. Much of the agitation and aggression commonly demonstrated by people with dementia who no longer have the language skills to explain their feelings probably arises from this frustration.
It might therefore appear strange that one common method of communicating with and dealing with people with dementia stresses the idea that they can feel secure in the knowledge that all their needs will be taken care of, that they no longer need to worry about doing anything for themselves. Is this what you wold want to hear in that situation?
To me, the approach appears deeply flawed. You're telling people who feel totally disempowered that they ought to enjoy that feeling. How frustrating is that!
More importantly, the best way of losing a skill is to stop trying to use it. If everything is going to be done for you, the few things that you can do for yourself will soon fall away. And your carers will have no idea of what you might be able to do with a little help and encouragement.
It's very easy for a carer to fall into this trap even if they don't accept the ideology. In many ways, life appears to go more smoothly if you do everything for the person with dementia because you can do almost anything more quickly and more efficiently.
But then you'll wake up one morning and realise that there's nothing they can do for themselves.